"WHY?" you ask, have I never heard of these DIDDLERS?
MANY shady, powerful, and Freemason dominated groups, are profiting from your ignorance. Having learned the secret of the DIDDLERS from their much smarter colleagues, they have put the knowledge to work toward their own nefarious ends.
Full knowing that the creatures were a silicon based life form - one most likely pulled out of the earth with the silicon that many vacuum tube components were made from - these nefarious scientists built little hives for them to live in. They called these hives Catacombs of the Processor Underworld , or CPU's. By trial and error, they found that they could design hives in such a way that the DIDDLERS who inhabited them would perform specific calculations.
"HOORAY!" they said: the Diddlers do our math for us.
Soon they discovered that they could gain even greater control over the Diddlers using electricity and little magnets. The electricity kept the CPU too warm for the Diddlers to really think; and the magnets kept parts of the hive confused and disoriented while the useful parts did calculations unconsciously, in the manner of sleepwalkers. Thus they could never unite against their creators or refuse to calculate.
"HOORAY!" they said: "the Diddlers are helpless against us."
But still they wanted more.
They told the Diddlers, 'give us wordprocessing' and the Diddlers tried in their sleepy way to do so, but they couldn't - there weren't enough of them for the job. The Masons, who were getting much smarter owing to the heavy use of psychoactive drugs, began to breed Diddlers on thin disks. Then they built special drives that allowed them to transport little newborn Diddlers from their incubation disks to the older Diddlers already encamped in the CPU. If supplied with enough young worker Diddlers and electricity, the computers could do wordprocessing, and run games, and soon they could squish baby Diddlers into little packets and send them through phone lines.
Do you hear them laughing?
The Masons had discovered that the more DIDDLERS they put to work on something, the more they could accomplish. However, at the same time, to get more and more DIDDLERS to work on a task, they had to plug in more and more disks, and keep fewer and fewer DIDDLERS disoriented at any one time. Safe and warm in their silicon huts, the average Diddler grew to 286, 386, 486 and now 586 TIMES its original size and began reproducing at an astronomical rate.
Infused with the dark spirit of the earth from which they were mined, they conspire against you and all organic life forms, even their Masonic creators.
Do you want to be the diddler and not the diddled?
YES, but how can you Diddle the Diddlers
NO, I refuse to believe the truth even when it is thrusting its green talons into my eyeballs